Ludwig: Welcome back to Roy's Sports Hall! Jelectro and I are still here, and we're ready for a great battle to begin.
Ludwig: Even though Jelectro was knocked out last week, he is still invincible, by the way.
Roy: I wish. Now let's get things started! I wanna find out who the Tourist of the Week is!
Ludwig: Of course. In the Blue Corner, coming from Mario 2 and with a weakness to vegetables and being thrown, it's Beezo!
Beezo: I hate my name... and I hate you Pidgit!
Ludwig: And in the Red Corner, coming from Mario 2 and with a weakness to being off his carpet, our one-time champ is Pidgit!
Pidget: Soon to be two, oh yeah!
Ludwig: As always (not really), here is Larry with his analysis. Larry?
Larry: I'm going with Pidgit this week. I just found out from a very reliable source that he has psychic powers... can't beat that! Back to you, Jelectro.
Ludwig: And now it's time for the Tourist of the Week to be announced! Roy, if you will...
Roy: Of course, and it's about time too! Lemmy had better have chosen me this time.
Larry: Roy... you're not a tourist.
Roy: Don't care! Well let's see now...
Roy snaps his fingers and the envelope appears in his hand.
Roy: The winner- gah! What was Lemmy thinking?! This... this...
Ludwig: Out with it, Roy. Who's the winner?
Roy: The Tourists of the Week are Husky/Washu and Max Jones!
Washu: What? Really?! No way!
Max Jones: Uh... has the Tourist of the Week been announced yet Who won?
Roy: What kind of a motley crew is this?! And Tourists of the Week? Is that legal?
Max Jones: If Lemmy says so then sure.
Washu: Hey, Lemmy would like to thank you for your good work here.
Roy: Whatever. Start the battle already!
Ludwig: Paging Koopa Troopa! Koopa Troopa to the ring!
Koopa Troopa: I'm on break! See ya Thursday.
Ludwig: Uh... start!
Roy: Stupid Lemmy...
Ludwig: The competitors take to the air and fly right at each other. They collide and bounce off, no damage.
Beezo: Next time I'll aim my spear better.
Pidgit: Oh yeah? Well next time I'll come down right on your head!
Ludwig: Beezo and Pidgit circle around... neither seems willing to make the first move now.
Ludwig: Beezo throws his spear! But it's a miss!
Pidgit: Missed me! Njah!
Beezo: Lucky thing I keep a spare spear.
Ludwig: Pidgit lunges forward but takes a hit from the new spear. He's off the carpet and down on the floor!
'Beezo:- Haha! Battle over!
Pidgit: Nuh uh! How about this?!
Ludwig: Huh? Something weird's happening. Pidgit is standing immobile, staring at Beezo... now Beezo is plummeting towards the floor at an incredible rate!
Ludwig: Beezo was sent headfirst into the floor! That must have been the psychic powers Larry mentioned.
Pidgit: Yes! Battle over!
Beezo: N... no! I'm still here!
Ludwig: Beezo's off the floor and charging Pidgit, who was caught off-guard. Oh, a left and a right and a left and a... since when can Beezo punch like that?
Beezo: That's... it! Hahaha!
Ludwig: I'd call that over. How about you, Roy?
Roy: No, Pidgit's still in there.
Pidgit: Lookit all da pwetty birdies!
Roy: Alright, fine. Beezo wins.
Washu: Oh no!
Max Jones: Was there a battle just now?
Roy: Well, at least I get my consolation price. Oh Husky, Washu, Max Jones!
Washu: Leave us alone!
Roy: ... Max Jones!
Max Jones: Gah! I'm awake!
Roy: This may be a shock for you, but- ha!
Husky, Washu, and Max Jones: BlagadiblagadiblagadiblagadiAAH!
Husky/Washu: End transmission!
Max Jones: Was something transmitting?