Roy: I sure am glad I got him deprogrammed from Kamek.
Hammer Bro: No, but really look at him! Pft, he can't even talk! He gets a good rap just because he can withstand fireballs. But when you get right down to it, he may as well be a Koopa Troopa. He's just got a fancy shell.
Roy: On that note, let's go to our resident analyst, Larry. Larry, who do you think will win?
Larry: I'm going with Hammer Bro today, on the grounds that if Hammer Bro loses you will probably defeat Buzzy Beetle yourself.
Pokey: Clap for challenger Buzzy Beetle. Cheer for champion Hammer Brother.
Hammer Bro: I think I liked him better last week.
Roy: Shut up! You're holding up everything! Now, today I'm going to call on a special fan to start the match. Will whoever is in seat XW27 come down to the ring?
Three hours later, Koopa Koot reaches the ring.
Koopa Koot: All right sonny, I made it. Do I get a coin for doing you a favor this time?
Roy: Nope, even better! Go to the center of the ring and start the match.
Koopa Koot: Well ok, but I'm not as good at starting fights as I used to be.
Koopa Koot hobbles to the center of the arena.
Koopa Koot: Ah… zzz…
Pokey: The match begins. Hammer Bro throws a hammer and knocks out Koopa Koot. Buzzy Beetle pokes its head out, then withdraws to defend against another hammer. Hammer Bro storms and hurls Buzzy Beetle… no damage. Buzzy Beetle pokes out its head. Hammer Bro slams the ground… Buzzy Beetle doesn't care about the flame ring.
Roy: Hm, but it's good for making marshmallows! Hm? Hey! Toast the marshmallow, not me!
Pokey: Hammer Bro is sitting on the ground and making a wailing sound. Buzzy Beetle is uneffected. Actually… Buzzy Beetle is just puliing its head in and out of its shell every few seconds. And… here comes Roy.
Roy: I say Hammer Bro wins, because Buzzy Beetle is apparently unable to battle.
Pokey: Hammer Bro wins.
Hammer Brother: Yow! Eh? Oh, I win? Yay!
Koopa Koot: Zzz… let the match begin!
Roy: Hammer Bro… next week?
Hammer Bro: Ah yes. Um… I'm not listening to the voice in my head this time. I'm just going to battle a Goomba.
Roy: …Ok. Ya know, that's really sorta smart.
Hammer Bro: Yup.