Kamek: Very good then, but Roy will be judging, which means we have two announcers tonight!
Kamek: Indeed. Let's meet our contestants! Pokey?
Pokey: In the Red Corner, Boomerang Bro.
Kamek: Oh come on, you can do better than that! Say it like this! In the Green Corner, weighing 150 pounds, a three-time champion, give it up for Hammer Bro!
Pokey: Too wordy. Birdo's in the Yellow Corner.
Kamek: You dare to even call that an introduction? And let's not forget the Lord of the Sky, because Lakitu, the most recent champion, is in the Blue Corner!
Roy: You idiots! Can't you at least do it the same way?
Kamek: Not a chance, because we are just too different.
Pokey: Here's Larry.
Kamek: No! Before you introduce Larry, you have to name the spectator of the week! Duh, everyone knows that.
Pokey: Oh… it's seat ILUVROY.
Kolorado: Oh no! Do save me!
Larry: Hey! Ok, I admit that I may have guessed wrong a lot in the past, but tonight I'm sure!
Kamek: Who have you predicted for tonight, Larry?
Larry: Well, after carefully measuring the odds, the angles, and the bribes, I have decided that only Birdo can win.
Kamek: Birdo?! You gotta be kidding me! She hasn't got a chance!
Pokey: That's he… and he could win.
Larry: Yup, and that's what's going to happen.
Kamek: Oh well, since I'm not in the chair today I guess I don't care.
Kolorado tries to run away but his arms are tied to the chair.
Kolorado: Oof! Um… I seem to be in a spot of trouble.
Pokey: Here comes Roy.
Kamek: You have to say why he's coming!
Pokey: People know.
Kamek: No, they need us to tell them he is going to start the battle! What if he is, I dunno, planning to barbecue?
Kamek: Why you- oh, hush now, Roy's going to speak!
Roy: Well, since you're finally finished… let the battle begin!
Hammer Bro: Huh? Wuh? Oh, battle time! Ha!
Boomerang Bro: I'm way ahead of ya! Look I just threw a boomerang!
Kamek: That's right, Boomerang Bro has just thrown a boomerang straight at Mr. Hammer!
Pokey: It misses.
Kamek shakes his head.
Hammer Bro: I hope that wasn't actually your best.
Boomerang Bro: It sure wasn't! I won't lose like I did last time!
Lakitu: Hello! I'm in this battle too!
Birdo: And you can't forgot me! Pfloo!
Pokey: Birdo shoots an egg.
Kamek: But Birdo's aim is way off! She misses Hammer Bro by at least five feet!
Lakitu: Decent, decent. Now see my attack!
Kamek: Wow! Lakitu threw a green Spiny egg straight at Hammer Bro!
Pokey: It bounces off his helmet.
Hammer Bro: Hey! Why are you all attacking me?
Birdo: You're the least cute!
Boomerang Bro: You're the stupidest!
Lakitu: Because- hm, no reason. Hey, how about we, the original followers of Bowser, gang up on Boomerang Bro?
Hammer Bro: Pal, I'm already there!
Kamek: I don't believe it! It looks like Lakitu and Hammer Brother are teaming up to fight Boomerang Bro together! I haven't seen this kind of teamship since-
Pokey: Green Spiny misses.
Boomerang Bro: You cheaters! Birdo, help me out!
Birdo: Sorry! I play alone.
Boomerang Bro: Ooh! Fine, take this!
Pokey: Boomerang Brother fires.
Kamek: It's a lot more than that! Look! Lakitu pushed Hammer Bro to the floor so that the boomerang misses him!
Pokey: Birdo jumps over it.
Kamek: Birdo fires an egg back while she's in the air! Nice acrobatics!
Pokey: Boomerang Bro is hit.
Kamek: He couldn't see it coming! Lakitu was blocking his view of the egg until the last second, when he suddenly flew into the air!
Pokey: Boomerang Bro is knocked into his weapon.
Kamek: He's also knocked out of breath! He's down! That didn't take long!
Hammer Bro: Hoo yeah! This is great!
Lakitu: Not for you though.
Hammer Bro: Huh?
Lakitu: Prepare yourself for this!
Pokey: Hammer Bro jumps off the floor.
Kamek: And he is hit in the helmet by the next of Birdo's eggs! He is forced back down… and here come the Spiny!
Hammer Bro: What the?! No! Noooo!!!
Pokey: …Hammer Brother was engulfed.
Kamek: There you go! That's the most description you've been into so far! Keep it up!
Pokey: Doubt it.
Lakitu: Haha! Oh yeah, now it's time for me to win! It's time to- what the?! YOW!
Kamek: Lakitu flew into the light hanging in the middle of the ceiling! He's taking a fall!
Pokey: In slow motion.
Kamek: Lakitu is down with egg all over him!
Pokey: It's over.
Kamek: Here comes Roy, probably to announce the results.
Roy: End of battle! Birdo somehow wins.
Pokey: Birdo won.
Kamek: Wow, what an excellent fight! And hey, Larry guessed right too!
Kolorado: I am saved!
Roy pushes a button.
Kolorado: Blagadiblagadiblagadiblagadiblagadiblag! End transmission!
Voice: Hey Pokey; should we tell them about the special event next week?
Another Voice: No.